“Thank you”, “Hello”, “Give me… please” and some other phrases and words are among a small number of words that foreigners simply in Korea learn and one of them is usually your message chingu , translated loosely as “friend”. Foreigners splice this word within their sentences that are english doubt and employ it seemingly without understanding just what it means. This really is probably certainly one of my least words that are favorite Korean and I’ll explain why.
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Some years back, I became using Korean classes four times a week for four hours every day. I happened to be devouring just as much when I could regarding the language because I became dating a Korean man, almost all of my buddies were Korean not to mention I happened to be residing in Korea and I also desired to make life just a little easier. Before you take the classes, I happened to be hesitant and weary of the things I regarded as forced respect inside the rules associated with the language, areas of the language that force us to show a respect that we may not need for some body. Simply because folks are older doesn’t suggest they always deserve respect and also at that point I’d held it’s place in sufficient circumstances to understand that a number of, usually, men just assumed in numerous ways that I should be respectful of them even though they disrespected me. Through the classes, I discovered simple tips to show my disapproval when being disrespected without being downright rude and I learned how exactly to be much more assertive in Korean. One of the greatest classes we learned, but, ended up being that We have nearly no “friends” in Korea. (From here on out “friend” in parenthesis would be the Korean kind of friend while a freestanding buddy will function as English version.)
My better half, boyfriend during the time, and I also made a decision to have a meet up at our house and invited our close Korean friends. There were about 10 of us across the dining table and I also was the only foreigner in the area. Only at that point, I’d known my boyfriend and all sorts of of his friends for a beneficial 4 or 5 years as well as in my tongue that is native would phone them my buddies. Following the food ended up being finished while the dishes found, I was thinking a casino game will be fun. Using just what I’d discovered from class on the best way to call some body by title, we stated, “So-yung-a, do you wish to play a game title?” making use of the lower as a type of the language be2. I experienced been gaining self-confidence with the language and utilizing it whenever i really could. There clearly was a gasp that is audible after a couple of seconds of silence, So-yung said, “yes,” but two for the more aggressively conservative people in the group said i really couldn’t say “So-yung-a” to So-yung.
Buddy 1: So-yung is over the age of you will be.
Buddy 2: You can’t say “So-yung-a” because you’re younger than this woman is.
Me personally: We’re friends though.
Friend 1: No, you’re not friends with So-yung.
Me personally: just What do you really mean? I’ve known her for a long time. She is had by me contact number within my phone. She is seen by me a whole lot. We are friends and my guide says this is certainly an ending that is appropriate a buddy.
Buddy 2: No, you can’t be buddies than you are because she is older.
Me personally: we don’t know very well what you’re saying.
Buddy 1: it is possible to simply be friends with some body this is the age that is same your self.
Me: Well, that doesn’t make any feeling. You might be all my buddies and you are clearly all avove the age of i will be.
Buddy 1: We aren’t friends and family.
After because I was just told I had no friends and also because the language they were using to express their viewpoint was very aggressive and I don’t handle aggressive situations very well that I went to my room for a little cry mostly. Originating from a training standpoint, aggressively attacking students for making use of a word or a term inappropriately hardly ever helps make the student respond in a way that is positive. Often, the student will end up more timid to make use of the language or make an effort to make use of terms in the foreseeable future unless they’re completely clear on their meaning. I also reminded my “friends” later that We don’t attack them if they misuse a word, if it is exceedingly rude, We remind myself so it’s not their very first language and I also make an effort to assist them to realize why it can be taken the wrong way. My “friends” however, are not so patient with my language purchase. I had taken some things and words in the book for granted not realizing they didn’t mean what it appeared they meant though I had excitingly read through my lesson books and went through discussions in my class. Two associated with the more tolerant people in our group arrived in to sooth me and explain in nicer terms just what everyone had gotten so upset about.
